Patiently waiting to live together saves something special for marriage.
Some couples argue that living together is like practising for marriage, comparing it to test-driving a car before buying it. But let’s be real – this comparison totally misses the true essence of what marriage is all about.
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Marriage is a lifelong commitment, a promise you make to each other and to your shared future. You can’t practice commitment by not committing.
Studies have shown that couples who move in together before marriage are more likely to end up divorcing, with half of cohabiting couples eventually parting ways. It might come as a surprise, but cohabitation often delays or entirely removes the idea of marriage from the equation. Sure, living together can provide some of the surface-level perks of marriage, but in reality, what you’re practising in cohabitation isn’t commitment, rather, it’s the opposite of it. This, in itself, sets a rocky foundation for your relationship.
Here are a few more reasons why moving in with your partner before marriage might not be the best idea:
Keeping your love alive
Research suggests that couples who wait until marriage to move in together have a better chance at happily ever after. It’s not superstition; it’s about keeping the magic alive.
When you live separately, you maintain a sense of anticipation and excitement when you see each other. You’re constantly learning more about your partner, and every date feels special. Living together too soon might take away some of that spark. So, by waiting till marriage, you give your love story the time to grow into something beautiful.
The pressure of commitment
Moving in together is a big commitment on its own, and it can create some unintended pressure. Imagine you’re living together, and suddenly, marriage comes up in conversation. What happens if you’re not ready for that step? It can lead to misunderstandings and even arguments.
By waiting until marriage, you’re allowing your relationship to evolve at its own pace. There’s no need to rush.
Financial freedom
Let’s talk about money, one of the biggest sources of stress in relationships. Moving in together means sharing expenses like the rent, utilities, groceries, you name it. And if you’re with a partner who does not contribute financially, that just means the financial burdens all rest on your shoulders.
Living separately allows you to maintain your financial independence. You won’t have to navigate the tricky waters of combining incomes and expenses until you’re legally bound by marriage. This way, you can avoid potential conflicts and keep your finances in check.
The space to grow
Living alone comes with freedom. It’s your space, your rules. When you move in with someone, you must learn to compromise and respect each other’s needs. This can be a beautiful thing, but it can also be a challenge.
By holding off on cohabitation, you give yourselves the time to grow as individuals. You can establish your own routines, personal space, and maintain some privacy. You need your independence for your personal growth. There are lots of compromises that come with living together.
Pursuing other dreams
Yes, love is a beautiful thing, but it’s not the only thing in life. When you’re living with your partner, it’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of everyday life. You might forget about your career ambitions, educational goals, or personal dreams.
Waiting until marriage to move in together allows you to focus on your individual aspirations without the potential distractions of shared responsibilities.